Buzz Report: iPhone 3G: Steve Jobs hates you Video
Buzz Report: iPhone 3G: Steve Jobs hates you Video Transcript
Hi, I'm Brian Cooley in for Molly Wood who is home amputating the first 3 fingers of her right hand to get used to the sacrifices of an iPhone 3G. Welcome the Buzz Report. First, the Gadget of the Week! No, dammit, it's not the iPhone. Someone has to resist. The gadget of the week is, oh ? hell, I don't know ? BOB! BOB merges consumer electronics and coin-op vibrating beds. It's a plug timer that controls how long you use a PC, TV, etc. When time allotment is up, it pulls the plug and you have to get your fat ass up out of the chair. And since BOB basically simulates a power failure, it's great for folks who want an easier path to hard drive corruption! BOB's aimed at limiting the time your children spend doing mindless, de-socialising stuff like watching TV or Twittering. Just think of the smoldering, matricidal rage you'll inspire in your kids when their TV or PC go dead right in the middle of something really good. Good luck with that. You might want to sleep with one eye open. OK, now the iPhone 3G ? Yes, it's finally here, new and improved -- now with 50% more less! No video recording. No card slot. No MMS. No copy & paste. No voice dialing. No stereo Bluetooth. No user replaceable battery. No more online sale & activation. And while the price of the phone was slashed, it costs more to own over a two year hitch. We contacted Jobs' office and his top execs gave us a frank answer why this is: There is no technical reason for these omissions, rather, Steve Jobs hates you. Apple explained that IF Steve's wife had been previously married to a psychopathic felon and had a child by him who was the guy's spitting image but with red hair, a low IQ and a passion for Windows, Steve would like that kid more than you. I'll see you in line at the Apple store. The first car that can read has just been announced in Europe and no it doesn't come with a copy of Dubliners -- it recognizes road signs, from speed limits to "do not pass" signs. The Vauxhall Insignia uses a camera to grok the signs and flash little reminders of them in the instrument panel. For now that's all it does and won't intervene. But cars can already self-brake thanks to the ABS system. And they can already control their own throttle thanks to drive-by-wire. We have cars that an correct lane drift. Now they can read signs. Do you really think its long before the camera starts telling the other stuff what to do? Enjoy driving while you still can. And here's another reason Steve Jobs hates you: Because you use Twitter even though it doesn't work! Research firm Hitwise tells us this week that Twitter traffic is up 500% compared to this period last year, making Twitter 12 times more popular than Plurk and 24 times hotter than FriendFeed - - even though its constantly down, with cute little messages that try to take your mind off the fact they have no idea how to run a growing web service. Hm, I think I will go twitter that. That's the Buzz Report. Thanks for watching.
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